Hassling the Fellowship
by Randomwriting98
Summary: What happens when two teenage maniacs end up in Middle Earth? They get swept into the adventure of course! Can they manage to survive orcs, trolls and the murderous glares of the Fellowship? God knows. Will they change the course of the story forever? Probably. T for some future cursing, bad language, violence and innuendo.
1. In which we turn up in Middle Earth

_Hi it's Randomwriting98 here! I've decided to write this at the same time as my other fic. I hope you guys like it; it's based on Lord of The Rings, with the world switching bit based on the Stravaganza series. I have always wanted to do a fanfic based on my best friend and I, though our names aren't used. I hope it isn't as clichéd as some others you may read and I hope it becomes a bit surprising. My last hope is that you like my OCs. Anyway enjoy the fic and please review each chapter because I want to see how you find it. Happy reading!_

_Disclaimer: I do not own the Lord of the Rings or Darren Criss' face (what a shame ;) )_

Chapter 1

I unlocked the front door hastily, gathering my various folders in the crook of my arms. I crashed through the front door and into the nearest chair. I glanced at my older sister Ingrid, who was seated at the table, surrounded by revision notes. I ran my hands through my medium-thick blonde hair and let out a massive sigh.

"Hey, great job getting detention nutcase!" Ingrid finally said, "What did you do anyway?" I smiled at the Spiderwick Chronicles reference.

"Mrs Morris asked why I didn't do my History homework. I told her that there was no point because she never marks it and she's a crap teacher." Ingrid shook her head with slight amusement; it was always the same.

"Oh Stella, when will you ever learn to hold that temper of yours?"

"Never, I expect. Talking about tempers, where's Mum?"

Ingrid's face just grew blank and she shrugged.

"God knows, you know how long it takes her to come home sometimes."

I nodded understandingly and didn't press the subject any further. What was the point? We both knew what she was like and neither of us really cared anymore; she was not worth it.

Later on, after watching Jeremy Kyle and feeling very normal, I sat up in the armchair and yawned.

"Well, I've got some homework that I'm not going to do, so what are we going to do now?" Ingrid chuckled a little bit before checking her watch.

"It's 10:30pm. We should be getting to sleep soon." She said thoughtfully.

"Do you want to read something until 12?" I queried, stretching each limb wearily.

"I have no particular requests." muttered Ingrid.

"Hmm." I emptied the contents of the bookshelf and I soon came across a very thick, dusty, red leather bound book. I sneezed, being really allergic to dust, and I brushed the thick layer of the stuff off the cover.

"The Lord of the Rings." I read out and the name seemed familiar to me, even though I hadn't read it.

"Oh!" Ingrid suddenly exclaimed, "We watched all the films at Christmas remember? They were brill!" I smiled; I remembered that we had enjoyed the films a lot as we watched them while eating pigs in blankets, waiting for Mum to come home from the pub.

"Do you want to read it until 12, and then we go to sleep?" Ingrid nodded her agreement. We went and sat on her bed because it was bigger.

We read out parts of the story in turn, surprised on how dark the story line was. We had started to feel drowsy around Weathertop and by the time we had read to Rivendell, we had fallen asleep.

…

As soon as Ningaeardir had found out that the hobbit had arrived at Rivendell, Glorfindel had instructed the younger elf to find Mr Baggins to tell him that Frodo had been hurt. He hurriedly took the stairs two at a time and soon encountered his cousin Legolas in the corridor. He stopped Ningaeardir in his tracks.

"Why are you running? What are you in such a hurry for?" Legolas asked, regarding the elf's face worriedly. Ningaerdir's strawberry blonde hair stuck to his forehead in clumps and he was panting.

"The hobbit has arrived," he puffed out, seriously unfit for an elf, "But he's wounded. I was entrusted by Master Glorfindel to tell Master Baggins."

"Wounded?" Legolas' forehead creased a little, in concern, and he absent-mindedly brushed a lock of long blonde hair behind his pointed-tipped ear, "With what?"

"Apparently a Morgul-blade." Ningaeardir noticed the look of horror that passed over Legolas' face before the usual mask came down again.

"Let's both attend to him."

They both set off running towards Baggins' lodgings, passing through corridors of white marble. Soon they met the main passage and they continued along it, gorgeous scenery flashing by as they passed windows. They didn't see the two teenage girls that appeared in front of them.

…

I opened my eyes and saw that I was standing in a white marble passageway that seemed to glow in the sun. It seemed oddly familiar, though I couldn't place a finger on it.

I only had a second to contemplate this before something crashed into me at great speed. I smacked heads with someone and tears leapt into my eyes. I saw a flash of blonde as I fell and landed on someone.

Clutching my forehead, I sat up and saw Ingrid wincing in pain.

"Ingrid?"

"Estella?"

"What are you doing in my dream?" we exclaimed in unison. We became aware of two other people nearby. Both were very fine looking people and both seemed to be in pain. They were also very strangely dressed in flowing robes with golden stitching. One of the guys had light gingery-blonde hair when the other had white-blonde hair. The white blonde guy was cradling his head in his hands and was moaning dolefully.

"Well Estella, you've finally done it; you've killed someone." I muttered to myself.

"By Sauron that hurt!" a male voice finally announced. The ginger guy was sitting up, rubbing his elbow, when the guy I almost killed kicked him in the shin. Sauron? Ingrid and I exchanged glances.

"Well I must say this is a strange way to meet but hey ho. My name's Ningaeardir, what's yours?" He extended a hand to shake and Ingrid took it very eagerly.

"Hi, my name's Ingrid and this," she jerked a thumb at me, "This is my younger sister Estella." I waved at him, wincing at the pain in my arm. Ningaeardir got up painfully.

"It's very nice to meet you ladies. This is my cousin and close friend Legolas." He gestured at his groaning friend, before using the same hand to help Ingrid up. She giggled a little like a little tinkling fairy and I sighed; she was always like this with attractive young men. He looked at our night clothes strangely as if his clothes were completely normal. As the guy's hair moved it revealed an ear with a point, much like an elves. What the hell? Suddenly it clicked. Sauron? Legolas? Elves? Middle Earth?

"Where are we?" I asked him and he looked puzzled.

"Middle Earth of course." A sullen voice butted in. Legolas looked up moodily and I took a small involuntary intake of breath. He looked nothing like Orlando Bloom; he was much better. He looked eerily like a paler, blonde Darren Criss (_AN: Yes I am completely obsessed with him :D). _He had a strong, angular jaw and slightly freaky forest green eyes. His hair hung over his shoulders to his waist like a white-blonde curtain. However his handsome features were weakened somewhat by the stony glare of hatred that twisted his face.

"We can't be!" Ingrid exclaimed, echoing my thoughts exactly, "Middle Earth is a fictional place in story books, it's not real. We're dreaming, we must be!"

"I assure you you are not dreaming! We are as real as you are!" cried Ningaeardir, with a slightly disgruntled expression. He touched his face, as if to prove to himself that he was in fact real. When he had assured himself that he was real, he gave Ingrid a look of determination.

"What are you doing here?" Legolas demanded rudely, getting up to look down his nose at me. Feeling kind of awkward and small, I stood up and crossed my arms defensively.

"We were reading the story YOU are in and we fell asleep. Then we woke up here and I had to clonk heads with that prat!" I addressed Ningaeardir, jerking my thumb in Legolas' general direction. In answer he bristled like a porcupine.

"Prat…?" Ningaeardir asked, half to himself. Too many dramatic things were happening in one day for him; the hobbit arrived with the 'secret parcel' and they crashed into two strange girls who seemed to be from a different world.

"So, you're implying that you come from a different world?" he eventually asked.

"Yes." I said; glad to finally get a point across to the elves.

"In that case, you need to come with me. Technically you are intruders, so I need to report you to Lord Elrond. I expect he will be very interested in you, Gandalf also perhaps." Legolas announced, roughly grabbing my arm before forcing me to accompany him. Ningaeardir took Ingrid's arm gently and followed Legolas and I.

"Who will tell Master Baggins that his nephew has arrived?" he asked his cousin wearily.

"Oh, he will be told by someone or other," Legolas replied dismissively, "Gossip always flies quickly, even in the house of Elrond."

Ingrid kept whispering to me that we'll be okay but I couldn't help thinking that no good would come out of being in Middle Earth.

_Hope you enjoyed that first chapter. If you didn't don't worry, thanks for reading my fic. Remember that it will get better. Please tell me if any of my characters become Mary Sues or Gary Stus because I can adjust their behaviour and hit my face on the table. Chapter two should be up soon, I have almost finished it. :D Thank you for reading this first chapter._


	2. In which we meet the Fellowship

_Disclaimer: I do not own any of the canon characters, the eyebrows of doom, Rivendell, the birdbath, the Gypsy Song of the Ghetto or Horrible Histories. I only own myself. Ingrid owns herself. I hope you enjoy this chapter. :D_

Chapter 2

We burst into the room, where Elrond and a few other people were seated. We caused quite an uproar; it was clear that there was some sort of meeting going on. I was pleased to see that Elrond still possessed the dark 'eyebrows of doom', despite not being Hugo Weaving.

He raised these eyebrows as he stood up to receive us. He dismissed the gathering he was with. They trailed past him, giving us dirty looks as they walked by. He prevented one member from leaving with a gesture of the hand, his eyes never leaving our faces. His fine black eyes showed wisdom that spanned over thousands of years and, I have to admit, I was a little scared.

"Legolas. Ningaeardir, who are these people?" We were forced forward and I immediately dropped into a shaky curtsy.

"Suilad Lord Elrond. I'm sorry but we have turned up by accident. We do not come from this world; we were reading the book you feature in and we woke up here." Elrond gradually developed an amused smile but also showed surprise at the use of Sindarin. Surprise also played on the faces of the two elves that had found us.

"I know not of this book you speak of mellón. Do you Gandalf?" Elrond looked to the tall, grey clad man, who stood on his right. The real Gandalf had an appearance not too dissimilar to Ian McKellen's, whereas the others looked nothing like their film counterparts. My breath caught in my throat when I caught sight of the maia.

"No. I have not heard of this book either but I have cause to believe the woman. I can tell when someone is lying and this woman most certainly is not. Pray, what is your name young lady?"

"My name is Estella." I croaked hoarsely. I coughed to clear the frog in my throat.

"That is an unusual name. I believe it means star, am I correct?"

"Yes you're right. My name does mean star."

"Hmmmm… a lucky guess I suppose." Gandalf said with good humour, "And what are you called, may I ask?" He looked encouragingly at Ingrid; it was as if he knew that she was shy around strangers.

"My name's Ingrid and I'm Estella's 18 year old sister. I'm a year and a half older than her."

"Even though it's nice to meet you ladies, it doesn't explain why you are here!" Elrond impatiently butted in before Gandalf could comment.

"I doubt we will ever properly know why they have come here Master Elrond. However we will attempt to find out why." Gandalf said, showing the full extent of his wisdom. "Come with me." He beckoned to Ingrid and I. We stepped forward and when he beckoned the elves behind us, they followed too.

We took leave of Elrond, the two elves pausing for a second; waiting for Elrond's consent. He waved them on and he followed us.

Soon we reached an outdoor pavilion, which showed shockingly magnificent waterfalls and mountain views. I had never seen so much green in my life. In the centre of the pavilion there was a marble object that bore resemblance to a bird bath. It was filled with a crystal clear pool of water and Gandalf stopped before it, staring into the distance.

After a few minutes of contemplation, Gandalf turned to my sister and I.

"I admit that I was telling Lord Elrond a lie," he began, "I do know of two books in your world that prophesise our adventures. One is set in a time before now and is about the adventures of Bilbo Baggins, I believe it is called the Hobbit. The other is called the Lord of the Rings, which is about our present adventure. Am I correct?"

"Yes," Ingrid gaped at him, "Yes you're right. How did you know?"

"With this." Gandalf gestured at the 'birdbath' and the water started rippling with a wind that wasn't there before. Suddenly the water cleared again but it was different; it seemed to hold a much greater depth than before and it was almost dark.

"A pensieve." Gandalf addressed the confused look on all four of our faces. I felt a tremendous sense of déjà vu here.

"Oh my goodness, total Harry Potter moment!" I squealed to Ingrid and we performed a jerky little victory dance. Upon seeing the bemused faces, I paused mid running-man and I stood there awkwardly, grinning like a fool.

"If you are quite finished," Gandalf muttered haughtily and we nodded, "Well then, take a look inside."

We dithered around for a minute and Ingrid eventually pushed me forward. Gingerly I stepped up to the pensieve and looked inside. Black, all I could see was black.

"Err Gandalf; I can't see-"I was cut off as Gandalf pushed my face into the water.

The sensation was so odd; it wasn't like submerging your face in water at all. No, it was more like an icy breeze blowing past you face. I felt like I was falling through the air. I opened my mouth to scream but no sound came out. Something big and black rushed up to meet me and I was sure I was going to die.

Suddenly I stopped falling and the 'ground' below me twisted and changed until I saw a familiar scene. I saw myself and Ingrid asleep on her bed both holding the book. We looked so peaceful.

I watched for about a minute before I was pulled back upwards in a rush of black. I was thrown out of the pensieve and I fell backwards with the momentum. Ningaeardir caught my shoulders before I could land on the floor and he steadied me. I smiled at him gratefully before turning to Gandalf, panting.

"I saw us, we were asleep!" Gandalf shook his head.

"I don't think that you are sleeping. No, I think that you're simply not awake there because your spirit is not there, it is here."

"What, so we don't have spirits over there anymore?" Ingrid asked. A wave of panic engulfed me as I thought of this.

"I think that when you go to 'sleep' holding the book your consciousness goes to where in the book you are reading. Only when you 'sleep' in this world you don't leave an earthly body, you just disappear."

"And what makes you say that?" Ingrid asked, confused, "Has this happened before?" Gandalf paused awkwardly before answering.

"Yes, it has happened before. Back in the age of Sauron's domination two young men from your world arrived here. Their talisman was much smaller than yours. Sauron immediately sensed that they were not from here and he befriended them, manipulating them into thinking that he was the only 'good' one in Middle Earth. One day, while the young men were on an errand for him, Sauron destroyed their talisman using some evil magic that could cross the worlds. They were trapped forever and were brainwashed into becoming his committed followers."

"What is a talisman?" Ingrid asked the wizard.

"The talisman is the thing that takes you to the other world." Gandalf simply explained.

"What was their talisman?" Ingrid continued.

"It was an elven medal of bravery not dissimilar to this clasp." Gandalf fingered the clasp of Legolas' cloak. It was shaped like a leaf and was made of a beautiful cloudy silver metal.

"What happened to the young men?" I ventured with an idea of what might have happened to them in my mind.

"Oh, they were imprisoned when Sauron was vanquished and they were eventually killed. They were no longer themselves and they were completely under his cruel spell. It was the kind thing to do."

We fell silent and nothing but the sound of a slight breeze disturbed the silent.

Eventually Ingrid broke the empty silence.

"I'm famished!" She announced. I sighed; she could eat all day and all night and still be hungry.

"I'm sure it would be fine for you to dine with us. We would have to get you some clothes so you will be less conspicuous." Both Gandalf and the elves turned to look at Ingrid and I, studying my owl pyjamas and Ingrid's red silky nightdress without a word. Gandalf told us to wait before disappearing to talk with the maid. Another silence followed this.

"Well," cried Ningaeardir cheerfully, "At least you get free outfit changes out of this!" I glared at him and he visibly wilted under my gaze.

About ten minutes later Gandalf returned with a young-ish elf maiden behind him. Two dresses hung over her left arm and I eyes them suspiciously. The first one was a dark purple colour and was made of very expensive looking crinkly fabric. It was embellished on the bodice, hem and sleeve tips with golden embroidery. She handed this dress to Ingrid.

"This should fit you."

Then she passed me a taller (as I was taller) dress made out of the traditional soft elven fabric. The colour was a sort of grey-green and it had fitted arms that widened into medieval-style sleeves. It had no embellishment and was in a way more sophisticated than Ingrid's dress.

"This dress was Lady Arwen's from when she was much younger. She had long since grown out of it but it should fit you." She handed it to me almost hesitantly.

"Do I look as if I care?" I muttered to myself as I adjusted it over my arms.

"Come with me." The elf maid commanded us and we followed her, leaving Gandalf, Legolas and Ningaeardir behind. She led us back indoors to some rooms.

"Here you go. You can get changed here."

I walked into one of the rooms; it was very elegant but very plain, containing nothing but a couple of oaken chairs and a full length mirror. The maid set down a pair of simple leather sandals before leaving the room.

I took off my pyjamas and changed into the dress. It was well fitted to the hips before falling down in folds. It was very comfortable to wear and the colour suited my skin tone and hair colour. The only thing that bothered me was the sleeves. I pulled on the soft leather sandals and I felt like a Middle Earthian.

I emerged from my room just as Ingrid left hers. She looked incredible in her dress but then she always did. The maid was nowhere to be seen, so we simply retraced our steps to the outdoor pavilion.

Gandalf and the two elves were deep in discussion when we arrived but as soon as they saw us, all conversation stopped.

"Ah yes, you both look much better now. Every time you wake up you will be wearing these clothes until you change them over here. Now, we were just discussing about how even though Ingrid and Estella are lovely names, we really should change them to make you less obvious to our enemies. What say you to elven names?"

"Yay!" Ingrid jumped up and down like a 5 year old not an 18 year old. Four pairs of eyes stared at her and she stopped, coughing slightly.

"Right Ingrid, from now on you shall be known as Fangwen, understood?" My sister nodded.

"And you Estella, you will be called Tuilindwen. Do YOU understand?"

"Tweelindwen? Yes I understand." I replied. It was typical; Ingrid got the cool sounding vampire name and I got the one that I couldn't pronounce.

"Come on my friends. I believe it is time for supper."

"Supper? Oh, yay! I'm starving!" Ingrid cried happily as we followed Gandalf.

"Is 'yay' one of the only words in her vocabulary?" Gandalf asked me.

"Ummm… yes" I replied.

We soon reached a larger outdoor pavilion than the one we had just left. Sweet elven music was playing and Elrond was talking with a party of assorted species. He looked straight at Gandalf when we walked in and Gandalf gazed intently back.

Eventually Lord Elrond nodded and I automatically assumed that they had exchanged creepy mind talking messages.

"Good evening Gandalf, Legolas, Ningaeardir, Fangwen and Tuilindwen. I trust you are all well?"

When we had assured him that indeed we were all well, he introduced the small group he was with.

"I'm very glad about that," Elrond continued, "Well allow me to introduce my new companions Aragorn, Gimli, Meriadoc, Peregrin, Boromir, Samwise and my dear friend Bilbo Baggins.

Bilbo approached me, a large smile making home in his face. Some smile crinkles had appeared around his forehead and mouth and his hair was silver but otherwise he had not much to give away his age. His skin was a brown as a polished boot and he looked very well indeed.

"You must be Tuilindwen." He said cheerfully, his hand pumping mine rapidly with the force of his shake, "That's a beautiful name."

"You're Bilbo Baggins," I responded with a smile, "It's lovely to meet you."

"I don't mean to be nosey but why do you have an elven name when you are not an elf?"

"Our mother was eccentric, she named In-Fangwen and I after two elven friends of hers." I hated lying to people I liked, even though I couldn't care less about lying in school, but I couldn't say that it was just my cover name, could I?

"Ah, I see. It is unusual but it happens sometimes."

Ingrid joined us after that and we struck up a conversation about the significance of wild mushrooms.

Aragorn was a tall, aloof dark-haired man who spent a lot of time looking into the distance. He didn't talk much at all.

Boromir couldn't be more different. His gingery-brown hair and cheerful personality set him quite apart from Aragorn. However his easy conversation became a little tiring in the end, as you couldn't get a word in edgeways.

The ring bearer's gardener Samwise Gamgee was also very cheerful compared to Aragorn, although he was reserved at first. He was fiery red curls, pale skin and a large capacity for food, more than even the other hobbits.

Merry and Pippin were the liveliest of the company, with rosy complexions and similar light brown curls.

"What is it with hobbits and curly hair?" I asked Boromir, who shrugged.

The final member of the group was the dwarf, Gimli. He was evidently very grumpy because of the way he grumbled to himself every few minutes, stroking his long red beard. He said not much to anyone and he glared at Legolas a lot. I'm not surprised, so was I. He had a massive scowl on his face as he played with his long blonde hair and he talked kindly to everyone else but Gimli and I. To us he was rude and antisocial.

After a wait of about ten minutes, filled with small-talk, a couple of young elves began bring out platters of food. Plates piled high with salad, small boiled egg halves and lightly seasoned flat bread circled around our heads before coming to a rest in the centre of the table.

Ingrid gratefully tucked in as she was fed up with eating oven chips and soup for dinner. I wasn't so impressed; it was like the free salad bar at the Harvester restaurant in town. However I took a small plateful and began munching my way through peppery rocket and some bread that tasted like oregano.

Even though the hobbits were more used to homely food, after a moment's hesitation they attacked the food like savages and attracted more than a few disappearing glances.

Gimli, however, was having none of it.

"I'm not eating this elfish muck! I have not bothered to set foot in twinkly fairy land to eat green food! Oh no! What I wouldn't give for some good homely chips!" he complained to me, attempting to whisper but failing miserably. Elrond looked up, raising the doomly eyebrows in compassion for me. However, I was saved from replying by the elf on the harp starting to sing. Gimli had found something else to complain about.

"Oh would you listen to that! Pure drivel! What I wouldn't give for some cheerful music of my own kind!"

"What I wouldn't give to make you shut up and stop complaining!" I thought in reply.

"I have to agree with you there." A voice reverberated in my mind with a caged bird type sensation. I looked up to see Ningaeardir smirking at me. I smiled to myself, wondering how many other people heard me. Taking the final bite of bread from my plate, I sat back and watched the setting sun retreat over the mountains.

My eyes strayed to the band and one instrument caught my eyes. I watched the male elf draw the bow across the strings. I admired the instrument; it was unmistakably a violin, which was my favourite instrument.

When the song had ended, Elrond looked straight at me.

"It's a beautiful instrument, isn't it?" he took it from the elf, who looked mildly annoyed, and turned it over in his hands, "Can you play?"

I nodded because I could. I used to save up my birthday money from relatives and pay for lessons every two weeks. I managed to get up to grade 5 but I ran out of money as I had been using money from my bank account to pay for the lessons in the end. I wasn't able to continue and I was gutted.

"Play us something." Elrond pushed the violin into my hand.

It had a very smooth and highly polished cherry wood body of full size. The strings were made from smooth white horsehair, as were the bowstrings. I trailed my finger experimentally across the strings and it made a pleasing and mellow sound. It was fairly old due to the sound it made.

I took up the customary position; with the centre of the violin over my elbow, fingers relaxed across the end of the bow and my feet shoulder length apart. My left foot was slightly in front of my right as I found it more comfortable to play like that. I then began to play.

I played the only song I could remember fully; the Gypsy Song of the Ghettos. It was a strange composition of uplifting sadness. My upper body involuntarily swayed with the music and I closed my eyes, relieving the only hobby of my childhood and cherishing it. As I hadn't played in a long time I only just managed to fumble my way through the trickiest notes. However I didn't care; it was wonderful to play again.

Eventually I completed the final note and I realised that I was balancing on the tips of my toes. Slowly I sank back down onto the balls of my feet.

Silence. Everybody just stared at me and dread gripped my heart. It could have been that bad, could it?

Elrond broke the silence with "That was very sad. A cheerful beat perhaps but sad. Very well done, it was well played Tuilindwen. What is that piece called?"

"I-I don't know. I wrote it without a title." The eyebrows of doom shot up and almost pasted themselves on the ceiling. Legolas gave a snort and Gandalf shook his head at me, amused greatly.

"Really? Wow, you have a great talent." Even though he was going along with it I was sure that he genuinely thought that I had wrote the song. I felt guilty, even though I would lie in school without a slightest bit of hesitation. I didn't like lying to these people because I liked them, excluding Legolas.

"Has anyone else here got any talents they would like to share?" Gimli was about to share his talent when Ingrid jumped up and ran to the spot, near the band, that I had vacated.

She gave me a big grin and I knew what she was about to sing straight away. I shook my head urgently, eyes massive with horror but she smiled back knowingly.

"I'm Pachacuti, the Incan Lord. All other tribes dreaded. My name means 'he who shakes the Earth'…Not that I'm big-headed." Ingrid began to sing, acting out the dance moves.

"Great!" I thought to myself. She was singing the Horrible Histories Pachacuti song. There immediately were sniggers behind hands and mollified expressions. At this rate, Elrond's eyebrows of doomliness would have been permanently stuck on the roof of the pavilion.

"If you were a rival chief we'd kill you first and then we'd stuff you like a scarecrow… but one for scaring men. Then we'd rest you bony fingers on the stretched skin of your belly and in the breeze they'd tap that tum like a drummer but more smelly!" She sang, slapping her stomach at the drummer bit. I couldn't take anymore humiliation and I face-tabled with a massive thud. Everyone jumped but it still didn't stop Ingrid from singing. I began to repeatedly bash my head against the table.

"Drink from their skull. Do the Pachacuti! Pull out their teeth whole. Do the Pachacuti! Use their skin as a drum. Do the Pachacuti! I've never had so much fun. Pachacuti!" Ingrid ended the song with a flourish and I looked up, wincing having made my already bad headache worse.

Nobody said anything for a while. It was Elrond that broke the silence again.

"That…that was interesting…" He stopped short without any other comments to give. There was another long and awkward silence. Boromir began to twitch as if he wanted to say something.

"You have a black eye, did you know that?" Boromir eventually said unhelpfully. I shrugged and the company went silent for a third time.

"Would you like to see my talent?" asked Gimli. When nobody objected to this he stood up and climbed onto his chair. He promptly began to do armpit farts with a look of intense concentration on his face. Many faces twisted with distaste. I jumped out of my seat, looking at my sister.

"I'm going to bed now. Can anyone show me to my room?" Ingrid got up with me, saying the same thing. We had had enough for one night and we just wanted to get back home. The elf maid who had helped us earlier appeared as if from nowhere.

"I'll take you to your lodgings." She said hurriedly as if also keen to get out of there.

We said our goodnights and walked back indoors, just as the sun sank beneath the horizon.

When I had reached my room I realised that I was really tired. I lay down and laid my head on the soft, comfy pillow. I felt as if I was falling into a spiral of blackness and then I felt nothing.


End file.
